Birthday wishes

Well, tomorrow is my birthday. I really wish the day would just come and go without notice.
It has nothing to do with getting older. I will be 34. I am fine with that. Age doesn't scare me, it just means I have survived that much more.

What saddens me is that I was a birthday present. Yup, my mom presented me to my Aunt Peg for her birthday, her birthday is 4 days after mine, with a guitar. Me and a guitar, what a combo.
Every year Peg would call and remind me " You know you are my birthday present, right?". I would usually roll my eyes and then reply "Yup, and aren't you lucky that I am the gift that keeps on giving".

I can't do that this year or ever again. There will be no phone call. I won't be able to roll my eyes at her outlandish singing version of "Happy Birthday" and we won't have our witty birthday banter.

I already miss it. Since she has passed in May I am constantly reminded of these little things that will be no more. It hurts.

I really don't know if I will ever be able to view my birthday the same way again. My birthday has always been linked with hers and now I am alone. I miss you Peg, Happy Birthday. How I wish you were here.